Problems of the typical Nigerian youth

As a youth you wake up on a Monday morning ,you have no job or handwork ,so you stroll to your other friend’s house who is also jobless  to talk about your next big game, which is not football or anything reasonable but a ludo game, you are completely jobless but you are the ludo champion in your area and you’re well known for your ludo techniques, so you dedicate the whole day to prepping for the next big ludo game where you’ll be facing another big ludo champion.

By Tuesday you are well prepared for the game, so you go round your locality to spread word about the game and to get blessings from your supporters who are at their own various business points , after every stop you smile and picture yourself winning the game , you also picture yourself with the most popular girl in your area who happens to be your landlord’s daughter , but you don’t care because you’re feeling like a star.

Wednesday is dedicated to staying at home and watching Rambo and van dam movies, in your own mind watching those movies gives you a sense of purpose because it give you a chance to be involved in any kind of movie argument that guys may talk about and no be better argument ooo , it will be stupid agreements  like ‘’ who is actor and who is boss’’ , who will kill who first and who will be the last man standing.

By Thursday , your football club is playing a match , so you wake up and try to do some small hustling so that you can get a seat inside the nearest viewing centre instead of staying outside and trying to watch through the small holes in the wall, by evening you bath and wear your  jersey and then walk to the viewing centre where you secure a good seat , now at the centre you feel so confident that you start making different kinds of mouth that your team must definitely win , but  36 minutes into the game nobody scores so you start feeling  nervous and then you decide to keep quiet. After a long game your team is defeated, so you quietly pack yourself out of the centre, turning a deaf ear to all your guys that were hailing you, you get home sad and you refuse to eat dinner and then you go to bed,  but by 2am you wake with this violent hunger , but there’s nothing you can do so you sleep back.

Friday ,you spend the whole day with Silipha who happens to be the only girl who gives a listening ear to all the lies you have to tell about how you’ve had so many chances to become rich and how you declined them because you’re waiting for the right time.

By Saturday morning you visit the nearest motor park to play Baba Ijebu  with the  small money you had obtained from Silipha the previous day, but after many attempts you see say the thing no dy work so you go home to make final preparations for ludo game  which is coming up that evening after some time you walk down to the venue to wait for the crowd to gather and by 4pm the game begins, after a raging battle between you and your opponent , you emerge the winner, but instead of using the money you won for something reasonable , you gather your gang and all of you relocate to the nearest joint where one Mama Nkem serves everybody 2 bottles of  Gulder each, at the table your friend s hail you like a king and you sef go dy feel like Obama , after sometime Mama Nkem comes to ask you for her money which luckily you have so you pay her and everybody goes home.

Sunday morning you wake up with a serious hangover ,but you manage to get your act together and then prepare for church, on getting to church you’re late and they are already giving offering so you deep your hand in your pocket and remove your last 50 card from last night and put in the basket ,after the sermon the prayer session is where you get into full gear because that is where you begin to cast, bind and excommunicate every demon and satanic agent blocking your  financial destiny ,you change gears between praying in tongues and shouting  at the top of your voice. but lets be sincere to ourselves you are indeed the beginning and the end of all your problems.