Fatal attraction

You see her at an event , she looks so fine, you can hardly take your eyes off her, she is shaped like a coca cola bottle and that is exactly what you like.
You approach her, you tell her how beautiful she is and how you just want to make her feel like a queen, she smiles, says thank you and then leaves the table.
You refuse to accept defeat, you still follow her, you chat her up and you eventually get her attention and you guys talk for some time and then she  decides to leave so you escort her to the parking lot where she enters her Mercedes Benz C 350 ,2015 model, she then starts the car, you smile and then ask for her number, she retaliates  and then she passes you a gold plated complimentary card, she then drives off.
You feel like a king that night, Infact you abuse all your guys calling them cowards as none of them have been able to secure any girl's digits, you go home and sleep like a heavy weight champion, the next morning you wake up feeling like a champ, you put on your best clothes, best shoes and best perfume, you borrow a friend's motorcycle to go and visit your new love, on your way you stop at the bank and withdraw all the money you have left which was about N6590.00, you smile and say it is love, you then ride your okada for almost an hour to get to her office .
You get to the office and its lunch time so she gives you a ride to a big eatery, you take a deep breath on seeing the sign, you enter the eatery with her and she chooses the VIP spot, the waiter directs you upstairs where another waiter takes your order,  you order a meat pie and a small ice cream and she just asked the waiter to bring the usual,  you smile and start eating your own lunch, she smiles and then asks you if you could do anything for her, as usual you open your stupid mouth and say yes, she smiles and then rubs your head and you start laughing like a Buffon. Minutes later the waiter returns with a trolley containing different varieties of desserts and the meal itself,  you start sweating and you begin to feel uncomfortable, but you no fit fall your hand so you smile and keep calm,she then orders for a bottle of champagne to wash everything down, at that moment you just had to go to the toilet, you excuse yourself and then head for the toilet, you just don't know how you got yourself into such a mess, you get to the toilet and start searching for a window but there's none, you keep your calm, wash your face and then head back to tell the girl that you don't have enough cash to settle for the food, on getting to the table you find out that the girl is gone,  your eyes are  finally open, but its already too late the waiter comes up to you with the bill, you look at it and the total is exactly N45,000  you smile at the waiter, but he doesn't smile back, you then bring out your N6590 and hand it to him,  he counts it and tells you that you still have  to balance N38, 410, you are now willing to do anything crazy to escape this man,  you pull him to one side and you tell him you don't have the balance he smiles and then tells you no problem, he then signals two guys with chests like agege bread who then come,  jack you by your designer trouser and shirt and then drag you to the back of the building where you receive not only the beating of your life, but also the humiliation of the century award, after your beating session, you were then forced to wash a set of dishes after which they let you go .Now let us do some proper analysis
1. You entered that eatery with your two eyes functioning perfectly well, but after your beat down session you ended up having one normal eye and one very black eye, I pity you, shey na you sabi love pass abi?
2. You entered that eatery with the hope of getting the love of your life, but ended up with the most humiliating moment of your life, which was also an achievement  anyway, you finally get out of the eatery without any money in your pocket to even take a cab, ooo God you are seriously in deep shit now, all you have left is the tears in your eyes so you just let them down at least you Sef done learn lesson, next time you see hot chicken, you go leave am
Lol wait, did you seriously think she was going to be your girlfriend, haha my friend just keep dreaming. Better work hard if you wan flex life my brother  #OLUWABLESSOURHUSTLE